


Five times Vinnie Delpino did not puke on someone's shoes

by carolinecrane



Category: Doogie Howser MD
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-10-01
Updated: 2010-10-01
Packaged: 2017-10-12 08:31:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/122952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carolinecrane/pseuds/carolinecrane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everybody grows up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Five times Vinnie Delpino did not puke on someone's shoes

Performance anxiety is no joke, especially when you're a film maker. So Vinnie worked hard to master his, and by the time he got to college he thought he was doing okay. Or maybe it was just the shock that did it, because the first time he managed to kiss somebody without throwing up on them, it was a guy.

One of the guys in his Intro to Theater class, specifically, who evidently got the wrong idea about Vinnie and planted one on him without even giving a guy a little warning. Which…okay, so maybe he had the right idea, a little, because the truth is Vinnie kissed him back. Then he shoved him away and explained – in a slightly higher voice than usual – that he was into girls. But he didn't puke on the kid, so it was progress.

After that first time, he figured a little experimenting was in order, just to see if his performance anxiety really was female-specific, or if he just needed to be surprised every time he was going to make out with somebody. So he set out on a series of experiments, first with a mousy girl named Hilary in his screenwriting class who was always making eyes at him. He puked right into her purse. It was pretty humiliating, but at least he didn't hit her shoes.

There was another girl after that, some coed he met at a frat party and if he caught her name at the time, he didn't remember it afterwards. All he remembers about her is a high, grating laugh and the disgust on her face when he puked on her skirt and her blouse and yeah, even her shoes.

Puking on some chick at a frat party wasn't really any big deal; it happened at least once every weekend, and it wasn't always a guy doing the puking. Kids in college drank a _lot_ of beer. But it was memorable enough for Vinnie to avoid girls altogether for awhile, and anyway he really needed a different kind of experience if he was going to prove his hypothesis or whatever.

He thought about kissing that guy who'd kissed him the first time, just because he knew it wouldn't get him punched in the face. But he was pretty sure he needed somebody totally new, so he went to one of those bars he'd heard about and made lame jokes about, but never expected to be inside.

He wished somebody had thought to tell him not to try to use the bathroom in a place like that.

Still, he saw some interesting stuff there, and none of it made him want to puke. Even when some guy cornered him by the bar and offered to buy him a drink before he shoved his tongue down Vinnie's throat, there was no puking. His gag reflex didn't even kick in. It was unsettling, frankly.

Normally he would have laid out the entire, embarrassing story to Doogie, but of course where was he when Vinnie needed him most? Totally incommunicado, that's where, so Vinnie was left to figure it out on his own. Which required more experimenting, and more kissing random guys and also maybe a little letting them take him back to their place for other kinds of experimenting.

Once he got over the weirdness factor, he was just glad to have a hard-on without wanting to throw up all over the place for once.

For the record, Vinnie never puked on Wanda's shoes. He puked on her legs, which is the same neighborhood, granted, but it's not the same thing at all. And he's pretty sure it wasn't the kissing that made him puke. In that case he's ninety-nine percent sure it was the beer, because getting too drunk to think straight was the only way he'd ever let himself kiss Doogie's girl in the first place, even if Doogie was off in the middle of nowhere forgetting all about them both.

Also for the record, she kissed him, and it only took him a little while to stop it because again, drunk. Not that he blamed her; she was mad at Doogie for ditching her to go off and save the world. Vinnie was still a little sore himself, so maybe that's why he got drunk with her in the first place.

Either way, Doogie was off working for Doctors Without Borders, and they were both still stuck right where they'd always been, and Vinnie missed Doogie maybe even more than Wanda did. So they kissed a little. And then he puked on her. These things happened.

She forgave him, of course. Things were weird between them for a little while, mostly because of the whole making out thing, but also a little because of the puke, Vinnie was pretty sure. But Wanda was cool, and when he finally got around to telling her he was pretty sure he was gay, she was pretty supportive. It wasn't like having Doogie there to talk to, but it was close enough.

Eventually Doogie did come back, of course. He looked older and thinner and even more exhausted than usual, but he looked _good_ too, so it wasn't really Vinnie's fault that the first thing he did when he saw Doogie again was kiss him. Hard. On the mouth.

Doogie let him, for a second, then he kind of eased Vinnie off him and gave him a look like he wasn't surprised, but he was sorry all the same. Which…Vinnie wasn't ever going to be sure how Doogie always knew these things before he did, but he was trying not to be annoyed about it.

"It's okay," Vinnie said, shrugging and it really was okay, because Doogie was his best friend and it wasn't like Vinnie was in love with him or anything. Okay, maybe a little. But he'd always been a little in love with Doogie, and it never got in the way of their friendship. "I wasn't planning that or anything. I'm just glad to see you."

"I'm glad to see you too, Vinnie," Doogie said, then he hugged Vinnie, probably just to show that he didn't mind that Vinnie was gay, but maybe also because he missed Vinnie just as much as Vinnie missed him. "Thanks for not puking on me."

"Don't mention it," Vinnie mumbled into his shoulder, then he squeezed Doogie a little tighter.


End file.
